I have no idea where this post is headed.
Today has been one of those "Momma just wingin' it" days.
Seriously, It is 11:43pm and once again, I am just now getting this post wrote.
My Life is one curve ball after another...
Most days by the time I can get myself up and going, I feel as though half the day is gone...Well, It really is since we have been getting up around 10/11am on a good day.
I hate sleeping in. I hate staying up soooo late that I feel jealous of everyone in bed before 1am. (And that is reeeeally late, for me!)
My whole system, body, routine, life is just a mess. Mixed up and spinning around me while I'm standing here with my cold coffee in hand trying to slow it down long enough to get a glimpse of where I am, what am I suppose to be doing and where has time gone????
I need space, privacy, routine, structure, a PLAN!!!
Why does it feel like I can't "get it together"??
How long can I keep doing this?
D#2 starts back to school in less than three weeks, D#1 started a new job today, and D#3 still has no clue what or when bedtime is!
Sean either is so restless he sleeps on and off for maybe two hours or sleeps all day long until after 4pm.
I'm somewhere in the middle, trying to stay up to somewhat be on his schedule so I can see him, but still be Momma at 8am...ya know? Like actually awake, functioning and not just being Zombie Mom day in and day out....over and over.
I sleep through the sunrise.
I sleep through alarms.
I sleep through my kids waking up.
I EVEN sleep through the first pot of coffee!
That is not ME!
I admit, at first, I thought this third shift gig could work.
I had a PLAN! Sean would leave around 9ish. I could get the girls to bed, maybe get a shower. I could work on my blog, reading, crochet, whatever I wanted to get done. Then I would sleep awhile and get up when Sean came home, let him sleep and the girls and I could start our day.
NOPE!! BIG FAT.....NOPE!!!
As usual, another curve ball(no "softball is my life" pun intended)
I can't sleep. The girls can't relax.
D#3 refuses to even get in the bed until I do.
D#1 is 19 and tries to stretch curfew!
We also live with 3 other people so...routine/schedule...GONE!
Oh and have I mentioned Fall Ball started today? Throw another one at me to rearrange the "schedule".
I'm tired, I'm stressed. I'm not perfect and I don't have a "right" way to do this.
Today, I'm just wingin' it.
Today, tomorrow... I am a work in progress(WIP)
Good night and blessings.